Taxi!

Tonight, I was standing on the corner trying to hail a cab after I got off work just like I do every other night. I always walk the few blocks to Larimer to clear my head and shake off the day. Seven cabs just drove on past, one right after another. They were either in the wrong lane or going the wrong direction, or simply driving too fast to stop once they saw me. It was bitter cold, and the sky was hanging full of stars against a blackness that only comes in the dead of winter.

Across the street, parked in front of the Capital Grille restaurant, there was a beautiful, shiny, white, town car with a driver wearing a fedora. It was the kind of car that is for hire from a car service if you have cash or clout. The driver rolled down the window and gave me a smile. I smiled back and continued my search for a cab. Finally the driver yelled out to me, “Lady, do you need a ride?” I smiled and nodded my head yes. I asked him if he could leave his patron for a few minutes and what his fare was. He said, “On a night like tonight you’ll be trying to get a cab all night long, so get in.”

He was from Washington D.C. and recently moved to Denver to open his own car service company. He has a fleet of 30 cars ranging from Town Cars to Limos. He asked me where I was from. He said I didn’t look like a Denver girl and if he had to guess I was from the Big Apple. He said I had a certain style that you don’t see in Denver very often. I took that as a compliment. He said a big city girl in a small town needed a touch of the east coast now and then…He didn’t even charge me for the ride.

There are gentlemen in this city after all and the kindness of a stranger on a cold night can bring hope to a slightly cynical small town lady with a big city soul.

Pink champagne and gray skies

It’s Thanksgiving 2008, and I am pondering my luck and my life. I feel incredibly thankful today. I have a wonderful little dog and cat whom I completely adore. I have a sound and supportive relationship with both of my parents. My mom spent the afternoon with me and my dad dropped by for a nice glass of wine and a chat. They got along….
I made a wonderful dinner. I made turkey breast and duck rolls stuffed with gorgonzola, chanterelle mushrooms, shallots, and wrapped in smoky bacon. I served them over fresh spinach and with fingerling potatoes drizzled with white truffle oil. I also served whipped yams with fresh ginger and coconut milk, spicy cranberries, and a lovely little cheese plate with a goat chevre and a smoked sheep san simon. My mom brought this amazing walnut and chocolate cake and pots au crème chocolat…delicious. We had this most amazing bottle of Gosset Reserve Rosé Champagne. Possibly one of the most fabulous wines I have ever had….mmmmm.
It was a beautiful day today. The kind I crave…the sky was hazy and gray diffusing the light in such a way that made everything look slightly violet and luminous. The air was cool and slightly humid. I imagine Paris looks and feels like this in late autumn. Oscar and I walked around for hours this morning. We met a new friend of mine for coffee on Larimer. He is a bit older than me, but a lot of fun. He grew up in Manhattan but likes living in Denver. He loves Clapton, traveling, fantastic cuisine, and pop culture. He walked with us and I could tell he just wanted to spend time with me. He seems a little bit sheepish and bashful which is unusual in a man of his age and stature. He seems like a really nice guy, and he has treated me like a lady, like a woman. I like it. It feels great.
I was telling my mom a little bit about him and mentioned that I am not really physically attracted to him and she said the most brilliant thing. “Maybe you should just forget about that physical thing, the gorgeous men you have dated have been nothing but trouble, and shallow, and it never works out anyway…maybe it is time to date a nice, and successful older man that adores you.”
Maybe she is right..(she is always right)..and I think I will consider it. He is really into me, thoughtful, considerate, and generous. Let’s see where it goes.

Love Letters

I received an interesting little email the other day. Remember I told you about the beautiful firemen from Montreal? Claude and Yves?
I opened my email on Sunday morning after and incredibly busy and frustrating weekend at work and there, between work and spam was the name Yves. My heart skipped a beat. Could it be the same Yves. It wasn't the same email address I had written to in the past but not recently. Recently I had been too busy to even think about men...as sad and lonely as that sounds.

I took a risk and opened the letter. It was very brief and slightly cryptic. He apologized for being rude and for his silence. He told me his wife left him a few weeks prior to our encounter. He told me she left a financial mess for him. And then he told me he was in a hotel room in Albuquerque.

Intriguing. It stirred something inside me.

I wrote back, explaining that while I was taken aback by his silence, am very happy to hear from him now. I asked him what happened in his marriage and why he was in New Mexico....I invited him to keep in touch...

I have so many questions. Why email me at all? Why tell me you are just down the road (several hundred miles but still)?
I have not received another letter...Why?

European Rosé

For me, September is a whirlwind tour of wine country. I go to daily wine tastings sometimes taste a hundred wines in one day. It can be wonderfully overwhelming and deliciously intoxicating. I must try to remember it is still work, it’s my job and I take it very seriously.

When I am tasting wines I am required to over think and analyze each and every wine I try. When I am relaxing with a nice glass of wine I still tend to analyze what is in the glass. Probably, the most enjoyable part of tasting wine is the wine and food pairing possibilities. I love to play with flavor and my senses to discover delectable and unique combinations. Over the course of the past several years I have developed a portfolio of pairings that seem to work regardless of vintage, region, and season.
I will share seasonal suggestions and wine and food pairings with you.

As for September, here in Denver, the days are still quite warm and dry and the nights cool down. The leaves on the trees are beginning to turn gorgeous hues of yellow, orange, and even plumy red. Late summer flowers like marigolds, mums, petunias, and roses are in full bloom. It’s not quite full bodied, earthy, pungent red wine weather. I compromise this time of year with full flavored, medium bodied, European Rosé. Some European Rosé can be musty, herbal, and woodsy along with showing nice ripe red berries and fruits. They can really represent what early fall means, right in the glass. These wines make an excellent choice for drinking cocktail style or pairing with your favorite representations of the harvest’s bounty. Foods like roasted root vegetables, squash, onions gratin, corn on the cob slathered in butter and sprinkled with garlic and pepper, or even a simple roasted chicken with red potatoes and crunchy green beans all taste better with European Rosé.

Table Seventeen

“I fell in love with a French Canadian fireman this week,” I gushed as soon as she answered the telephone.
“Oh la la, do tell, where did you meet him, and how in the hell did that happen? I just talked to you a few days ago!”

It happens that there were 20,000 international firemen in Denver this week for a conference. Yummy, right? On Tuesday night, I was working at the Wine Loft, this very cool and very new wine bar in LoDo on Wazee Street. Not much action save for a few ladies drinking Vinho Verde on the patio in the sun. It was a beautiful afternoon.

The Wine Loft just opened on Saturday. It is an elegant wine bar. The floor plan is wide open and it looks a bit like a grown up living room with subdued golden bronzy walls, sheer bronze drapery, and plush brown couches from ZGallerie. The space is littered with gilded mirrors and illuminated with candles. It is truly beautiful. We offer a delectable menu of haute cuisine small plates and nearly 200 different wines are on the diverse list. I really enjoy working there. I am assisting in the creation and expansion of the wine list. It’s been a great experience for me. I love, love, love wine.

Around dinner time two distinguished gentlemen walked in and sat at table 17. As I walked over to greet them I could hear them speaking in French. “Great,” I thought, “Good looking and French…I’m in trouble.”

I turned out they were from Montreal, in Denver for the firemen conference, and were looking for a good bite to eat and a great glass of wine when they stumbled upon the Wine Loft. They stayed for hours and we talked about wine, food, and French. They prompted me to speak with them in French but I became intimidated as usual and reverted to English. The few phrases I attempted were met with patience and with praise. I really appreciated that. They told me a little bit about their week and I told them a little bit about mine. They would be sight seeing and going out on the town during their free time. I would be in classes and working on Thursday, Friday, and on Saturday. They said they might stop back by. And they did.

They came in on Thursday for a bit to eat after attending the Breckenridge Brewery Beer Festival with a group of comrades. They were not into the burger and beer thing so they came in for some “real food” and good wine. Table 17 again. I was busy that night and didn’t wait on them but I did have occasion to stop by and chat a bit. They visited Boulder and Golden but didn’t make it to Estes or Red Rocks. I learned that Yves is a fan of mountain biking and wants to bring his bike to tackle some of our finest trails. I told him that Lance Armstrong just competed in a race in Leadville. He was impressed. We talked about snow and the climate differences in Quebec and Colorado. Claude gave me several suggestions for the menu and the websites for two prominent Canadian Sommeliers. One is traditional and one is avant garde. During our conversation I could feel chemistry building amongst the three of us and I was not sure exactly where it was stemming from. Was it Claude or was it Yves. Both men were vying for my attention and both were getting it. We said our good byes and I exchanged business cards with them…just in case I get to Montreal to see the autumn colours…I knew they had dinner plans with the Korean delegation on Friday and wanted to come in afterward. The evening was out of their control.

On Friday, it rained all day and was only 60˚F; which for August in Colorado is rather unheard of. I love the rain and gray days give me energy and make me very happy. I had a meeting with three wine reps at the Wine Loft and drank a lovely bottle of Perrier Jouet Fleur de Champagne with them. After my meeting I treated myself to a nice dinner at Crepes et Crepes. I wandered back to work around 7:00 pm. Downtown was empty. It was still pouring rain and the Wine Loft was quiet. A few friends of the bartender were sitting at the bar but the house was empty.

I was very surprised to see them walk in early; at 7:30 pm dressed in suits and looking gorgeous. Mmm I’m smitten…but, with Yves or with Claude? Claude is taller and brawnier. He has chocolate brown eyes and graying hair. He has a boyish smile and has a direct and intense personality. Very good looking. If I had to guess I’d say he is a Scorpio. He is definitely the talker and commands more attention. He is the Director of Operations for the Quebec Fire Department Academy based in Montreal. He is 41 years old. He used to play keyboard in rock and jazz bands and he hopes to again. He gave me an official Quebec Fire Department pin. He knows his wine and loves to share his point of view.

Yves is more unassuming, not as tall and thinner. He has soft blue eyes, dark blond hair and an enchanting smile. He is more gentile and a bit shy. He is the one who tried to get me to speak French and asked me questions about myself. He is the Coordinator of Programs for the Q.F.D.A. He is new to his position. He just sits back and watches the conversation flow. He participates when he has something important to contribute…a Libra maybe. He taught me the proper way to present a toast…with held eye contact, and meaning. He commented on the U.S. habit of avoiding direct eye contact and touching. Claude agreed. Claude won’t call us Americans because Canadians and Mexicans are technically Americans too. Interesting. Yves was a rigger for concerts and rides a Triumph. Sexy. He was attentive and there was a pleasant surprise on his face when he learned I too ride a motorcycle. He commented that I am quite a woman. He kissed me on the cheek when he left, and he invited me to come to Montreal.

They left Denver on Saturday and that evening at the Wine Loft there was an emptiness in the room. Table 17 was lonely for guests. Every time I walked by I noticed a sad little smile on my face as I felt the presence of the two men in my heart. I felt a certain longing to talk with them and see their smile and hear their voices immersed in a conversation in a language I am only beginning to understand. I think they stole my heart when they left.

the most fabulous clothes in Denver

There is a clothing trend in Denver that is everywhere and it seems as though every girl wears it. Day and night, summer and winter…I call it the “Going Out Outfit.” It begins with too tight, low rise, dark wash, boot cut jeans paired with chunky heels in the summer or black boots in the winter. It is always topped off with a jewel toned, sparkly, cotton camisole or a sequined, jersey knit baby doll that conceals the tummy and the over-hang that occurs with the low rise of the jeans. In the winter some girls add a little sweater or a cardigan to the look. It can be a nice look, except everyone ends up looking the same.
The “Going Out Outfit” look is simple and requires very little thought or planning and it fits with the busy lifestyle of the Denverite woman. Add a cool necklace, perfectly highlighted and blown out hair, and she is ready to go out on the town with her girls. I see ladies of all ages wearing the “Going Out Outfit.”
It seems like everyone shops at the same two or three stores: Banana Republic, Bébé, and Arden B. Most stores carry very similar lines with subtle color and cut variations. Banana is the most conservative and Bébé, and Arden B carry nightclub attire that some people try to translate into business or daywear. Even if people shop at department stores or discount stores the clothes all look the same. Why bother even looking at Vogue when it’s all pre-selected for you anyway?
And then, once in a while, I see a lady with a sense of style all her own. She may be pretty, or just interesting, but she definitely stands out from the crowd. She may be a girl that travels the world and shops as she goes, picking up uniquely fantastic pieces when she finds them. Or, maybe, she has a secret little shop in Denver where the selection is an amazing array of famous designer lines and up-and-coming trendsetters. What ever her secret…she is the girl to study.
There is a little boutique tucked away in Cherry Creek North just like this. Garbarini at 3003 East Third is an oasis of style in a sea of trends. The original Garbarini was a beautiful little shoe store on my favorite street-Larimer Square that started over twenty years ago. It has evolved and expanded many times over the years and in its latest incarnation it is truly a haven for beautiful, timeless yet chic clothing, jeans, and shoes. Garbarini has the coolest selection of shoes, belts, bags, and other accessories of any boutique in Cherry Creek. The selection of classic business wear is the best I have seen in Denver. Nothing in the store looks stuffy, matronly, or boring. The clothes are modern and fashionable without being merely trendy. The styles are timeless, feminine, and most importantly, they are beautiful on just about any chic woman.
Garbarini carries classic Euro style as well as modern American designers. Designers found at Garbarini include Ya Ya, Jon, Plein Sud, 
Vertigo, 
Alvin Valley, 
Nicole Miller, Cynthia Vincent, Pons Quintana, Old Gringo, Donald Pliner, and 
Gianni Bravo...the list goes on.
On a recent shopping spree during the famous Cherry Creek Sidewalk Sale, I found a beautiful pair of hand made Donald Pliner, distressed lacquer pumps in an amazing shade of copper marked down from $335 to $49. I came away with a pair of Claudia Ciuti black and white patent spectator booties also marked down to $49. I found a black and tan, polka dot, chiffon wrap blouse by BCBG Max Azria for $29, and a summer weight, grey wool fitted jacket by Alvin Valley that was $500; I got it for $49. I paid $29 for a great pair of black wool trousers by Jenne Maac. I also bought a gorgeous silver linen skirt by Jon that was $300 for $49 and a blue and white linen tank by Majestic Paris priced at $100 for $15. My favorite steal is a cocoa coloured, featherweight cashmere sweater marked down to $15. It is deliciously soft. I wish it wasn’t 97 degrees today because I am dying to wear it! This incredible sale happens twice a year and the deals are unbeatable.
I have every piece I have ever purchased at Garbarini and I can still wear them. They are well constructed and timeless; always appropriate. Every time I wear a piece I receive compliments and approving looks. Everyone wants to know where I shop. I look like a million dollars, and, I feel like a European movie star when ever I wear my Garbarini collection.
http://www.garbarinishop.com/

What is wrong with Married Men

I am not sure what it is about married men, but; they have a thing for me. In the past two years I have unknowingly attracted a whole string of them. I never seek them out and I am not the type of girl to settle for seconds. I may have unconventional views of marriage and monogamy but I’d never force them on another married couple.

When I get into a flirtation with a man the second question I ask them is, “Are you married?” They always respond with a “No,” or something along the lines of “I’m separated,” or “We are getting divorced,” or my all time favorite, “My wife just doesn’t understand me anymore.” One man actually said, “Why couldn’t I have met you while I was still single?”
Let’s see, there have been the Wine Maker, the Italian, the Ball Player, the Chef, and most recently the middle-aged Barista. One thing they all have in common is that they are all in their forties or fifties.

This cute couple always came into the wine store to buy a bottle of Italian red for him and Jack Daniels for her. They were happy, friendly, and interesting. They seemed made for each other. The man is half Italian and his long time, live in girlfriend is one of the sweetest ladies I’ve ever met. A year ago, in the spring he started to come in alone to make their purchases. I’d always ask about her, and how they were doing. He’d always ask me about my studies. I study at work when it’s slow. Apparently, she traveled frequently for her job. As it turned out, his daughter was in one of my classes. He was very impressed that I maintain a 4.0 GPA and I work full time. I guess the daughter doesn’t pull those kinds of grades.

We became friends; talking about hopes and dreams and the future. He wants to travel through Italy and see where his family comes from. He is a cyclist. I suggested he give winery/cycling tours through Italian wine country. I thought he was a great guy; friendly, caring, interested, but involved and in love with his girlfriend….so I immediately put him into the friend category. We talked about the demise of my last relationship and all of the lies and deception I went through. I began to trust him.

When the semester was over he offered to take me to lunch to celebrate my good grades and a much-needed break. We went around the corner to a little place for an alfresco lunch late one afternoon after I got off from work. He was so easy to talk to and we had everything in common. After lunch he walked me to my car, and then he kissed me. I was shocked and very put off by the kiss. I didn’t know what to think. I got in my car and simply drove away.

I didn’t hear from him for a few days. When he did stop by the store he apologized for surprising me with the kiss. I asked about his girlfriend. He said, “We are probably breaking up, and she has accepted a job in Detroit. She is moving there and I am not going to go with her...My life and my family are here...” After a moment, he said, “I’d really like to see you again, will you go out on a real date with me?” I told him I’d think about it and gave him my number. We went out that Saturday night and there were definitely sparks.

We went out for three months. We went for dinner at Via, and for drinks at Samba and the Cruise Room. All summer long we wandered the streets of LoDo hand in hand and made out like teenagers at the DCPA. We were both enchanted. I was beginning to fall for him. We had very hot sex all over his loft; on the kitchen counter, in the living room, in the bedroom, up against the wall...We had long, heartfelt conversations about our dreams, hopes, interests, lives, and our ex’s. The conversation quickly became a “we” conversation. He told me he was falling in love with me and that they were over. Then, one day…he told me that he and the soon to be ex-girlfriend were going to Mexico for a week on a vacation that they had planned before the break-up. I was upset and didn’t understand why anyone would go on vacation with their ex even if it was already paid for.

A few weeks later, after nothing from him, She walked in the store. I was definitely surprised to see her but used my acting chops to cover it up and muster the courage to ask her how she had been. She told me she had been in Detroit for two months working on a contract and that she was so thrilled to be home…

As soon as she left I called the cheating, lying bastard and told him that his lovely girlfriend and I just had a fabulous conversation and she told me everything I needed to know about him. Immediately I stopped calling him and wouldn’t accept his calls. I told him to leave me alone. What a complete jerk. I now realize that he lied to me over and over just to use me for a hot, summer fling. He knew how badly I had been hurt by lying and cheating in my last relationship and he was angery with my ex for treating me that way, but, the entire time we were together he was lying to me as well. That is evil.

Over the last year he still comes into the store and flirts with me and asks me out on the occasional date. He still tells me how enchanted he is, how beautiful and sexy I am, and how much he wants to be with me. He still tries to kiss me. And, until yesterday, it was so hard to resist him. But now, I see him for who he really is. ( A few months ago I ran into her in the park and she told me she is going to Australia for a month this summer.) Like clock work he came to see me the minute she left.

Two days ago, he came by my work and had big tears in his eyes and I could tell he was miserable. He told me he missed me and fumbled around with his words. He told me I looked amazing, elegant and beautiful, and that he couldn’t resist me anymore. He asked me to lunch the following day, which was yesterday. I accepted his invitation and thought to myself, “This is the perfect time to tell the Italian bastard off once and for all.”

Just as I was getting ready to walk out the door for our lunch he called:
“I don’t think we should have lunch today.”

“Why.” I asked, casually.

“Because you entice me, and intrigue me, and you are so sexy that you scare me.”

“What is so scary about me?”

“I want you and I shouldn’t, I don’t know what to do, but we can’t have lunch.”

“Ok, no problem, but, then you need to stop seeking me out, and coming to see me, and calling me. I am never seeking you out. You need to leave me alone.”

“Ok, (followed by a very long pause) are you sure?”

“Oh yes, yes, and you need to delete my number from your phone.” I replied very calmly.

And with that I deleted the Italian from my life. What makes him think that I deserve to be jerked around like that? It was the lies that killed it. Had he been honest things would be different. What makes him think that I don’t deserve more than that? Is it because I am sensual, and sexy, and understanding, and compassionate? Am I just that unattainable wildfire that every man fantasies about but doesn’t have the courage to be with? I guess I will never know. My only question now is, “What in the hell is wrong with married men?”

Assaulted at Work

On May 1, 2008, I walked into at the restaurant on 17th and Wazee where I am a hostess and was immediately told by a co-worker that George Mitrovich was coming in and he wasn’t going to be happy. He is some hideous, self-important, aging, former politico who heads up the Denver Forum. He regularly holds little dinner meetings at the restaurant. He is widely known in the restaurant industry for terrorizing staff members. He makes servers cry and unleashes his venom upon anyone that doesn’t submit to his control. He is actually banned from the Oxford Hotel due to his obnoxiously rude behavior which is directed toward staff.

“Lovely,” I thought, “and I get to deal with him.”
I looked at the reservation board and discovered the source of our problems. George is used to getting “his” room and the Catering Department booked a different party in the room. McCormick’s has several side rooms which can be booked for private events for a fee. George never pays the fee and just expects to get “his” room. Nine times out of ten it is available but that night it wasn’t. I had the busser/table setter person set up a table for George in the Plum Room.

The room George expects is called the Governor’s Room. When George arrived the other party was already occupying the Governor’s room. I was in the kitchen when George arrived and a server showed him to his table. I caught his eye as I briskly walked past the entry way to the room. I could tell he was fuming mad. The telephone was ringing and I had guests waiting but George didn’t care. He rudely motioned for me to join him in the Plum Room. He said, “This is not going to work, we have a serious problem here.” I explained to him that the other group paid for their reservation in advance and it was out of my control. I offered to get a manager for him. He walked toward me and said, “I am extremely unhappy, and you are going to get the brunt of it.” As he said it, he thumped me so hard on the chest three times that he left red marks. Shocked, I stepped back away from him and told him there was nothing I could do and suggested he speak to a manager. He kept talking at me and his vicious words took on a louder tone. By now there was a line at the door and all three phone lines were ringing. I told George that I had to get back to my job and he quipped, “You just don’t care about me at all, fine, fine, just go…”

As I got to the host stand, my ‘Manager on Duty’ finally waltzed by and I urgently motioned for him to attend to George. I carried on with my job. Moments later George slinked up to the Host Stand and said to me, “I hate to be argumentative. We are all friends here,”
I interrupted him with, “If you hate to be argumentative then don’t argue with me. You are not very friendly when you are yelling at me.”
He looked astonished and replied, “If I were yelling at you, you’d know it.”
I replied, “No, George, when you are yelling at me you should know it.”
At that he crouched down, put his face very near mine, and sneered at me, “You’d better watch yourself.” Then he turned on a dime and stormed off.

One of my co-workers noticed I was visibly upset and asked me what happened. I told him everything. He went into the kitchen and told the other manager and the chef. The chef came out immediately to see if I was ok and find out exactly what happened. The managers did nothing; they did not escort him out or even reprimand him for his behavior. They allowed me to be assaulted and threatened for the price of a dinner.

I couldn’t sleep that night. I knew my managers were not going to take care of the problem as they had said they would. I called my friend the D.A and asked his advice. He convinced me to press charges so I called the police and gave them my statement.

Days later, my General Manager apologized to me for what happened and the Director of Catering tried to sweep it under the rug. She said, “You just don’t know George. He is just like that.” She also tried to get me to drop the charges, at one point saying, “George has spent 40 years building his reputation.” To which I curtly replied, “So have I.”

Over the past two months I have never been contacted by the City Attorney’s office until this week. Victims’ Advocacy did call me twice to tell me the case was continued. Ms. Smith, from the City Attorney’s Office called today and wanted to hear my side of the story. I told her the short version and although she finds his behavior appalling and reprehensible, she doesn’t think she can get the charges to stick. Obviously, assault and threats are not important to the City of Denver.

The bastard is going to get away with his nasty behavior again. He has a free pass and I have anxiety and insomnia. She said touching is not illegal, and I said to her, “It wasn’t polite touching; it was aggressive assault at my place of employment followed by a threat.” I asked her how she would feel and she agreed that she would not feel very good about it or about her work if that happened to her. I also expressed my grave disappointment in being completely let down by the system which is supposed to protect the victim but all too often, and in this case, protects the criminal.

Ms. Smith did suggest that my employer is at fault for not protecting me and the rest of the staff from this man and for not stepping up and escorting him from the restaurant when he did assault me. His previous bad behavior is a very strong indicator of his current and future disposition to bad behavior. She suggested contacting the EEOC and an attorney about a civil suit and damages. I tend to agree with her. I feel as though I set up for this situation, thrown to the wolf, and made out to be the bad guy. The way they let it happen, George would be angry with me, take it all out on me, and not be angry with the managers or the catering department who gave away “his” room.

To Fly or Not To Fly

The D. A. called me last night at 7 pm to confirm that we are going to go flying and then to lunch on Sunday. He has a small plane and a passion for flying. When we were dating a year ago I asked him to take me up. He never did. He is very good-looking and very good on paper with his big law degree and his important job. A year ago I thought we had a spark.

I went to a wedding with him last weekend after months of zero contact. He called out of the blue, and I thought it might be fun to get dressed up for the evening. I was mainly in it for the cake and the dancing. He wanted a pretty girl on his arm and to feel me up. We were almost late and he had to drive like a crazy man.

The wedding was nice, at the botanical gardens. It was a young couple, too young to be getting married. The groom was the son of his work out partner. The ceremony was short and sweet. The reception was inside a large tent with air conditioning, passed hors d’ouvres, a simple buffet, and cheap wine. He is an extremely picky eater, to the point of being rude. “I don’t eat mayonnaise, or anything with mayonnaise in it, or anything fermented, or anything with cheese, I don’t like fruit or vegetables…and I don’t like this or that.” How embarrassing. “Can I have some dried out, plain chicken and bland steamed veggies without any flavor or life left in them…” I guess some people never learned to be gracious and polite.

The band was a great little blues and country cover band. They were showmen and really knew how to work the crowd. It was the high point of the evening for me. After the first dance, the dance floor was packed with young and old people having fun. He wouldn’t even dance with me so I danced alone with all the other disappointed ladies. After the wedding cake was cut we left. I barely had a chance to have a bite of my cake. It was only 9:30 pm. The wedding started at 7 pm. He was tired from kayaking all day. Great, I felt I’d dressed up for nothing.

At the wedding he asked me to go flying with him the next weekend and I told him I’d think about it. He said he’d take me to lunch, like real a date. Friday evening when he called to confirm our date he said I'd have to meet him at the airport because he HAS to go kayaking straight from the airport and there will be no lunch, and we can only fly for an hour.....
Moments later he asked me to dinner. I was walking my dog and I'd just eaten a bowl of lime gelazzi, Oscar had vanilla. Nothing like waiting until the absolute last minute. It always feels like his other plans fell through when he calls me and I am the last minute, backup girl.

Should I go flying or should I delete him from my life? (I actually know the answer to that question.) From his actions I know that we are not and will never be in a real relationship, or even be friends. It seems he only wants physical affection, but, only once in awhile, and when he has nothing and no one else to do. But, when we are together he is affectionate and seems interested. He said he wants to take me to Paris for a week in the spring. He thinks he is very skilled at his game but it is actually completely transparent.

So, he called me an hour before I was supposed to leave for the airport to ask for a rain check. I had no intention of going to the airport. He was busy the day and night before and didn’t get enough sleep, blah, blah, blah. He asked, “Can you reschedule for next weekend?”

“No. I have plans.” With a roll of my eyes.

“How about during the week, are you free in the morning?”

“No. I don’t think so, I work and school is starting in a week, I am really busy.”

“Well, can you at least go to dinner with me this week.”

“No. I am busy all week.” Thinking to myself…I have to clean my house, do laundry, wash my hair, and spend time with my dog and my cat.

“Ok, well, I’m gonna call you and ask you out, it was really great to see you the other night and hold you in my arms for a minute…” (Which is man code for I’m horny and you’re a warm body!)

I hung up the phone. He hasn’t called. I guess I will hear from him in a few months when he has some B-list event and can’t find a date.
Too bad, I won’t be answering my phone next time.

My crazy dating life

I seriously have the strangest dating life of anyone I know. In the span of two years I have managed to attract a fine mix of men. I am not going to use their real names here but to anyone who knows me knows that these titles are very transparent.

The District Attorney (D.A.)
Very nice looking man. He is 54 years old, which I agree is too old for me, but, he is physically active and fairly sharp. He is a classic narcissist and very arrogant. He was fun in the beginning. He has a jazz show on Tuesday nights. He is a pilot (small planes) a kayak fanatic, and way too athletic. He is always nursing some injury. We dated a few years ago but he is so completely unavailable in every way that I finally just lost interest. He still calls me now and then for dinner or some B-list event.

The Wine Maker
Not really my type at all but he makes great wine. He is short, plump and balding with a girly Southern accent. I wanted him as a mentor and he offered to be one. He is from Texas and lives in Northern California where he has been making wine for thirty years. He told me he was separated from is non-understanding, bitchy, wife and she lives in Southern Cal. He asked me to dinner twice and canceled both times at the last minute. His wife was recently stalking me via hate email.

The Professional Baseball Player
I met him in the wine store and began to sell him a vast amount of high-end wine via mail order. He played for the San Diego Padres when I met him and ended up retiring as a member of the Los Angeles Dodgers, after a very successful twenty years playing the game. He told me he was divorced from his model wife because she wanted to raise the kids in Florida and he was transferred to California. He hated her…it was something about a major contract and millions of dollars that she has cost him. We went on a handful of dates. Then his wife intercepted a wine order bill and called me about it…they were obviously still very much together.

The Italian
This guy was a patron of the store. He and his girlfriend have been living together for ten years and she helped him raise his three children. His daughter and I are friends. We had a class together. He is 45 years old. He is a cyclist. He is cute, funny, and usually very light hearted. He is going through a small mid-life crisis. He is, unfortunately, very charming and has many of the qualities I am looking for in a man so it was easy for me to become involved with him. We dated for several months last summer when I thought he was newly single. We shared our dreams and inspired each other. You will get the full story later.

The Spy
This guy was intriguing. He works as a “Spy” for the Department of Defense. We talked about conspiracy theories and went on one very nice date at Venice. He thanked me over and over for the date, and the new restaurant experience, and made quick follow up call for a second date the next day. Never went on the second date and never heard from him again.

The Barista
This married man works at the Market, my favorite café on Larimer Square. We’ve always been friendly and chat whenever I am there. He is a musician so we have that to talk about. He is so not my type; short, chubby, late forties, and he works in a coffee shop. Lately, he has been very flirty. He does landscaping and I gave him my number months ago so he could refer me to a great backyard fountain and Koi pool guy. He won’t stop calling me. He said, “Why couldn’t I have met you when I was single.”
I haven’t been going in for my morning coffee and today when I stopped in for an espresso he gave me the cold shoulder and tried to charge me double. I laughed and left the coffee sitting there as I walked out the door.

The Chef
Heavy flirtation at work with the chef, who told me he is not married and not happy, and only lives with her because she has nowhere else to go…I believe him. I will write more about him later. He is very unhappy at home. But, clean that up before you ask me out. Granted, the restaurant business is laden with constant sexual innuendo and major flirting. Most of the people in the business are hooking up and trading partners on a regular business. It’s a little twisted. But, it can make the work more interesting.

The Kid
After months of being asked out by this young guy I finally went on one date. It was little awkward and I had to lead the conversation. He is a cutie but just not very cosmopolitan. He never called or talked to me again, and made me pay for my dinner. He lives above the wine store so I see him almost every day. He always smiles when he sees me.

The Pilot
My first and only foray into the world of online and long distance dating. He and I carried on by email and telephone for three weeks. There was too much great connection and I felt it was somehow…fake. He became very mean with me and tried to suck me into a twisted mind game. He tried to make me feel like I am less than and bad about myself. Psychotic. He quickly turned out to be very strange, controlling and mean. I ended it and as it ended up; he is was Dom and there is absolutely NOTHING submissive about me! Eew! What is wrong with people?

Chocolate Soufflé and Dancing

Last Thursday night, after a busy night at work, my boss invited me out for a glass of wine and dessert. We went down the block to Sullivan’s. I’d never been there before and did not realize there was a happening bar with live music. He must go there after work all the time because everyone knew him and our drinks were on the house. The bar is nice, on the small side with 20 or so cabaret style tables. It is a classic 1940’s Chicago style steak house with dark, polished wood, red banquets, and dim lighting. “Steaks, Martini’s, & Jazz” is their hook.

Several large, muted televisions were hanging on the wall displaying the professional basketball finals. The crowd was an eclectic mix of off duty suits relaxing with martinis, neighborhood locals drinking beer and wine, and restaurant industry personnel drinking whatever the bartender was sending their way.

I had a wonderful Spanish Grenache and he had some sort of whisky rocks. We ordered a yummy chocolate soufflé. It was fantastically warm and light. It was delicately scented with cocoa. There was an elixir of creamy warm vanilla syrup drizzled all over it. Just enough decadent lushness for two…if you are on a fabulously romantic date…I wasn’t.

There was a fantastic band playing called Tito del Barrio Malaga. They are at Sullivan’s on Tuesdays and Thursdays and worth your time. I’m not exactly sure how to classify their sound. It’s this cool mix of Latin Salsa and Moroccan world beat. …
Even the music on break was a great little mix of Motown and Chicago Blues. Very nice, very easy, and very dance-able.

La vie de mon chien

If you have a dog in Denver it’s almost as if you are a member of an exclusive club, and inner circle so to speak. I call these people the café group. On Saturday and Sunday mornings they are found filling up every street side café, coffee bar, breakfast joint, and restaurant scattered across Denver. Dogs are unofficially welcome on most restaurant patios and many downtown boutiques.

I take my little dog, Oscar, nearly everywhere with me. On Sunday mornings we walk across Auraria Campus, along the Cherry Creek path to Confluence Park and back to Larimer Square. It takes about an hour and by the time we get to The Market we both need a drink. I have a cappuccino and Oscar takes part in the communal doggie water bowl. He doesn’t really like to share his bowl with other dogs.

Larimer And Writer’s Squares, between 14th and 16th on Larimer Street, are the prettiest areas in downtown Denver. They are lined with original buildings dating back to the birth of Denver in the 1800’s. The squares are filled with cool restaurants, boutiques, galleries, and the occasional nightclub.

The Market has been on Larimer Square for nearly 30 years. It is a European style café and deli with a great coffee bar. The food is kind of like the food your grandmother would have prepared for your summer family reunion…the ultimate comfort picnic food. They have a large sandwich board and the baristas make cappuccinos with the swirly foam art on top. Very pretty. There are always stacks of New York Times or magazines to read, and the people watching is fantastic. There is an intellectual cosmopolitan edge to the clientele. Now that downtown is brimming with residents the Market has a more prenentious slant that comes with baby boomer wealth, than it had in the past. It used to be intellectual and artistic seedy. I loved it, and I still do…but, it is different.

Oscar and I walk the by Market a few times a week for a coffee and on Sundays we sit and watch the people and watch the world go by.

Style

Style has nothing to do with trend following or what is hot…but it has everything to do with fashion. That may sound contradictory but it isn’t. Style is classic, timeless, and universal, but always with an edge or and unexpected twist. The most stylish women always take something classic and make it unique to them.

Trends come and go relatively quickly. They are modified and recycled every few years. Unfortunately, you can’t really hold on to something trendy in the hopes it will come back because when it does, it’s never quite the same and what you kept always looks dated. Trends rarely look great on anyone over the age of 28 and over a size 6. Trends are for youth, and are the segue into the world of fashion, and that’s where trends should stay. They are not realistic, well made, or comfortable. They are not built to last and that’s ok. A trend is ready made, pre-packaged, exactly what the glossy magazine page depicts tight down to the styled bracelet, shoes and bag. Trends take all of the thinking out of dressing and everyone ends up looking alike. It takes a certain girl to follow trends, and she is usually rich, young, beautiful, and bored.

It is said that style is something you are born with but maybe it’s not. Everyone knows Audrey Hepburn had amazing personal style but she also had Hubert de Givenchy dressing her. Jackie O was also known for her style, created by Oleg Cassini who along with Edith Head, costume designer for MGM, also styled Grace Kelly. Catherine Deneuve was the muse of Yves Saint Laurent. Now, I agree that these women all had remarkable if not slightly similar, and obviously conservative style, but, what about the ladies with a bit more flair and personality?

Iconic European stars of the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s like Sophia Loren, Brigitte Bardot, Simone Signoret, and Fanny Ardent, and modern girls like Monica Belucci, Catherine Zeta Jones, Julie Delpy, and Marion Colitard are all wonderful examples of sexy and stylish women. There is nothing cold and untouchable about these women. They are earthy, sultry, gorgeous, and intoxicating.

Choosing the right style icon for your personality is the key. I love the classic beauties but I don’t have ice princess looks or personality. For me, I look to the sensual, European sex symbols for inspiration. These ladies make the most of their curves by wearing tightly belted full skirts, frilly little tops and high heels, or fitted, dark, boot-cut jeans with a pretty blouse and sandals. Their clothes are simple, feminine, and understated. These women have relatively small wardrobes of very high quality and timeless clothing. They personalize their look with fabulous, high quality accessories. They wear unique and well-placed jewelry, beautiful purses, scarves, and fantastic shoes. They have sunglasses perched on top of their heads holding back their long, flowing, wavy, locks of glossy hair.

Something else about stylish women—they always tend to be just slightly overdressed for any situation. They stand out because they pay close attention to every detail. They feel beautiful, confident, and sexy because they take the time and effort to look amazing everyday. It’s easy for a superstar with access to all the great designers and personal stylists. The rest of use must try to cultivate our own style. Which is, by the way, what really turns heads when you strut across the room.

The best place to be SINGLE in America

What is it about dating these days? I just don't understand standing someone up. Is it so difficult to pick up your celly or blackberry and give me a call or at the bare minimum--send a text..."Sorry babe, I'm not going to make it." I mean, everyone has some form of communication technology strapped to their body like a stylish tracking device.

Denver has been voted the "Best Place in America to be Single" by Forbes magazine off and on for ten years. I often have to translate that title for my single girlfriends. It means: “Denver is the best place to be SINGLE.” This is man-speak. It is utterly clear and without hidden meaning. We ladies often misconstrue the actual meaning by over analyzing it, but it is blatantly clear.

We ladies hear, “Denver is the best place for DATING or for landing a relationship,” but it’s not. It’s the best place to be single. Look around, all you will see are groups of single people hanging out together in bars, cafés, the park, or just about anywhere. Right now, at my favorite café there are two tables of single girls chatting loudly about men while at a table a few feet away there is a table of single guys talking about Guitar Hero.

My Barista friend, Scott, agrees. Denver is the worst place for dating because no one ever makes a connection. No one has to. It’s built in to the culture here to remain single for as long as possible. There is just so much you can do alone or with your friends.

Denver has fantastic weather. It’s sunny, warm, and everyone wants to be outside rollerblading, cycling, rock climbing, or kayaking in the summer and skiing or snow boarding in the winter. These are all solitary activities even when done en masse. Just how much connection do you establish by dangling a rope down a cliff to someone?

When a possible connection is made and I accept an invitation for a real date I often find myself swirling my cappuccino and making small talk as he checks his text messages. That is, if he even shows up.

On this particular evening, I was planning on having a little drink with this sexy guy I work with. I’ve always had a strict “no dating at work” rule, but it has been forever and we have been flirting like crazy for months. He asked me out for a drink thing and I agreed to meet him. He is a great kisser. Every now and then he will grab me unexpectedly and kiss me with such passion that it takes my breath away. Always in some empty room or in the downstairs storage area…where we could be caught at any moment. Very sexy.

Well, I waited for twenty minutes sipping on a cool glass of rosé. He never showed up, and he never called. He blew it. The next night at work he gave me the big “I’m sorry” eyes but he didn’t have a valid reason. He “got scared…I’m too sexy…and blah, blah, blah.” Then he said, “Let’s go out next weekend.” I just shrugged my shoulders and walked away. It’s too bad; he is a really great kisser.

I learned a long time ago after years of dating, that the behavior on and around the first date is a pretty good indicator of the entire relationship. If someone doesn’t respect my time or me, they don’t get a second chance. But, that is just dating in Denver. Is romance worth it?

My cappuccino is drained and I am sipping a glass of wine, sitting in the window of my favorite café watching the world go by. I am looking at one of Denver’s trendiest streets watching the pairings of people scurrying here and there all dressed up but looking stressed and annoyed. I wonder why I want to jump back into the dating game. They don’t look happy or in love, they look bored and obligated. And then they walk by. That perfect couple. They are effortlessly in love and it shows. Neither one is over or under dressed. They are not trying too hard. They are not all over each other as if to prove something or for attention. When they do touch, how ever lightly, I can almost see the sparks their contact with each other creates. When they look at one another, it is like witnessing rapture and a passion that burns not only within them but flows into the entire room over all of us. The temperature of the room seems to rise slightly. I can feel a slight fever within me as I sit on the edge of my seat in anticipation of their next move. It is difficult not to stare at them. It makes me remember a time when I was swept up into my lover’s arms and kissed so deeply that it made me tremble…and then I remember why I want to date again.

I will continue to date, and be stood up, or disappointed, or left wondering why he never called because the passion in my soul is like a wildfire. I am sure most men are unsure if they want to risk being burned or consumed by that fire. I pour the rest of my wine into a paper coffee cup and I walk to the train. I just want to crawl into my warm bed with my dog on one side and my cat on the other and dream about passion.

What "Live from Denver" is all about

This is a site for those of us who want more out of life. We have grown up a little bit and are tired of the club scene. We are finished with trying to have a conversation over blaringly loud and equally bad music. We are ready for a more fulling and richer existance but we don't know exactly where to go to find it or how to make it happen.
We are finished with the overly done, trendy sectors of Denver that are too pretentious, expensive, and simply too much of a scene. We want more. We want better music, more interesting (and cleaner) venues, unique clothing, fantastic shoes, amazing food and wine, fascinating entertainment, and really great friendships.
We have grown up, our lives have changed, our tastes have evolved, our horizions have broadened, and our time is much more valuable; but, it seems as though Denver has not kept up with our changes.
We want the "Sex and the City" lifestyle, and Denver isn't anything like NYC...or is it?
Let's find out what Denver has to offer in terms of dating, dining, shopping, entertainment, education, and self transformation.

Welcome to my blog

Hello from Denver,
Today was a fantastically beautiful, spring day in Denver. It was 75'F which is generally a little bit too hot for my taste because 75'F at a mile high seems so much hotter than 75'F at sea level. The rays of the sun seem to bake me and I burn very easily.
But, today it was cloudy and just a little bit humid. It felt wonderful and I loved it. These are my favorite days. Cool, silvery grey, and slightly humid...love it.
Days like this only happen once in a while here in Denver. That is my major complaint about Denver...I detest the climate here. The weather is extreme. It's called a high desert...lovely!
In the summer it is unbearably hot and very dry. The sun is very intense and almost always shines brightly. The sun at a mile high is very, very intense. Summer is short in Denver-June through August and maybe part of September.
Autumn is colorful but brief and not cool enough for beautiful layers of Fall clothes. Winters are cold, messy and snowy. Denver doesn't get as much snow as people think. It's actually quite dry, and cold, but the sun always shines. It is cold here from October to late April and sometimes early May. It warms up in April but it is very unreliable...it can snow at any moment. Late May and early June are realy the only Springtime.
The climate is part of why the city is not necessarily fashionable and almost always too casual. Fashion is largely dictated by the crazy climate; which in Denver means you have to be prepared for any kind of weather which is largely unglamorous. In the heat of the summer, the less you wear the better you feel and shorts and flip flops are the norm. In the winter, jeans and ugg boots are everywhere. I dress up my winter clothes with pretty cashmere sweaters, but that is about as dressy it can get. I don't like it at all. As a result I have a closet full of beautiful clothes and shoes that I hardly ever get to wear...let's see if I can change that over the next year.